Huh? Amende?

I was bored, that day in 2004. And I thought, hey, daripada aku jadi pembaca sahaja... apa kata aku hop on the bandwagon and become a blogger myself?

Pada masa itu, fenomena blogging ni... bukan sesuatu yang terlalu pelik. Tapi pada waktu tu, tak de lah ramai sangat yang memblog.

Not like right now.

Thus, tanggal 6 Julai 2004, I published my first post, as a blogger.

Back then, this blog was called ‘Conversations in My Head’. I renamed it ‘Amende?’ after a while because it sounded more approachable. Lebih selamba & santai.

Not too uptight ;p

More... me, I guess.

Sedar tak sedar... 5 tahun dah berlalu.

6th of July, 2009.

Wow.

Wow.

Who knew I'd last this long?

Who knew that for 5 whole years, this blog would be my constant companion?

Tempat aku meluahkan (kebanyakkan) perasaan aku. Tempat aku merakamkan kejadian menarik yang berlaku. Buah fikiranku. Hopes & Dreams. Observations. Heartache. Success & Failures.

This blog has stuck with me (or vice versa) through thick & thin... and even thicker.

It has lasted longer than some people have lasted in my life.

And, thus... dear friends, it is with a heavy heart that I inform you that I’ve decided to ‘retire’ from blogging.

Cukuplah 5 tahun sahaja aku bertahan sebagai seorang blogger.

Cukuplah 5 tahun aku 'tinggal' di alamat ini, di cyberspace.

‘Rakan’ paling setia. My blog. My refuge.

But all good things must come to an end.

It’s been one hell of a ride.

And I thank you for experiencing it with me.

Don't be a stranger, yeah?

~Zyrin~

This Is Why He's Hot

Lanjutan dari Aiza's FB status yang mengatakan Johnny Depp is *hot*, and ada yang komen untuk definisikan hot...

... *this* is what makes him hot. To me, lah. Other than his yummilicious good looks, awesome & kooky acting talent... he's a giving guy.

A private family man, but willing to do the little things that makes people happy.

He's just a... nice man.

Or maybe I'm just a sap for men who makes children happy, hehe.

And, yes... I am fully aware that this could also be a publicity stunt for his new movie. But let's give Mr. Depp the 'bersangka baik' treatment, shall we?

Taken off PerezHilton;

This is the kind of thing that makes Johnny Depp not only an exceptional actor but also a super awesome dude!

While in the UK promoting his newest flick, Public Enemies, Johnny gave a few very sick kids the thrill of a lifetime. He went to visit them at the Great Ormond Street Hospital dressed as his Pirates Of The Caribbean character Captain Jack Sparrow!!!

Amazeballs!

Johnny visited several wards, including the one his daughter was admitted to when she was treated for kidney failure in 2007, and graciously posed for pictures with all his young fans.

A source recalls: "Johnny was so friendly with all the children in the ward and they absolutely loved his pirate outfit. He spoke to lots of the youngsters and staff - and made their day by posing for pictures with them all."

He's done this kind of thing before. And for him to do it again, that just makes Depp first-rate class act in our book.

Bravo, Johnny!

Nonsense di Pagi Ahad

Zyrin dumps all her freshly laundered clothes unto her bed and starts folding.

Oooppss... forgot something :)

Leans over, and after a few clicks, has her music library on shuffle mode on Windows Media Player.

Hums as Gwen Stefani comes on.

"I know he thinks you're fun and stuff, but does he know how to wind you up? Lalalalaalalla~"

Ahhh... nothing like Mrs. Gavin Rossdale to make one cheerful on lazy Sunday mornings :)

Fade Into the Woodwork

I am who I am.

I'm sorry.

I'm me.

I might not be good enough

Or pretty enough

Or smart enough

Or brilliant enough

Or slim enough

Or active enough

Or charming enough

Or witty enough

Or talented enough

Or pleasant enough

Or caring enough

Or interesting enough

Or fun enough

Or memorable enough

Or efficient enough

... and the only thing I'm pretty good at is fading into the woodwork. I've got plenty of practice - almost 28 years of practice, in fact.

I am Queen of the Woodwork, if you will.

So I really don't know why I get so disappointed when people don't see me anymore... BUT just the woodwork.

Really, you'd think my heart is done with breaking.

Aksi Kejam Minggu Ini

Satu hari di rumah...

She heard the sound of someone climbing up the stairs. Still sitting on her bed, she peered at the staircase, and spied a glimpse of black songkok & blue baju melayu.

A minute later, Ayah appeared at her doorway.

"Hi, Ayah!" she said, extra brightly.

"Hmm..." Ayah barely grunted as he shuffled towards the master bedroom.

"Ayahhh... Ita dah naik kereta KDa..."

Ayah grunted again. "Yelahhh..."

"Ita dah naik DUA kaliiii..." she pointed out smugly, holding up 2 fingers, walaupun Ayah langsung tak pandang dia.

"Yelah, yelahhh... semua orang dah naik keta KDa... Ayah jer tak nak keta KDa lagi..." ujar Ayah dalam nada merajuk.

Ngehehehehehe... aku tersengih jahat.


Boleh tak, buat Ayah sendiri jealous? Hahaha... sabar je la kalau dapat anak macam aku ni!

Yeah, Baby!!!

Oh, yeah.

*This* baby rocks! Especially masa masuk gear 'S' tu... vroooooooooooommmm.... screeecccchhhhh <--- bunyi tengah buat drift

I now understand why guys with them cool cars get them chicks, y'all.

HA???

Apakah?

Thread JISIM+ dah sampai 626 messages?

LOL.

We *do* talk a lot, don't we, luv?

Heart

I yearn for the sea.

It calls to me.

To my heart, to my soul.

It is both exciting and frightening.

And yet I still yearn for it.

For A Pessimist...

And you said that I was naive
And I thought that I was stronger
I thought, hey I can leave, I can leave
Oh but now I know that I was wrong

I guess I’m not as strong – as unfeeling – as I once thought.

Which sucks eggs, really.

And the one who thinks of me often and is always there no matter what tells me “Stop being a doormat.”

And the one who provided safe harbour when I was lost at sea tells me “Stop caring about people who don’t care about you.” <--- basically, that’s what this person said... in that roundabout way this person is famous for.

Like I said, for a pessimist, I am a contradiction. A closet optimist.

I keep believing that maybe this time, things’ll be different. That people are inherently good, and they don’t really mean to be mean.

Yeah, I know... wake up and smell the roses.

I guess... I still have to learn to let people go.

I can’t keep thinking about the welfare of those who don’t care if they hurt me.

FREEEEE!!!

Sebelum

Selepas

TQ, wanita berkebaya ungu! Moga anda panjang umur dan sentiasa murah rezeki... Amin!

Untitled

I cannot deny that 'part' of me. 'It' has been with me for the better part of my life.

Denying it is like denying something that makes me ME, you know?

But everytime it happens... and I watch their expressions change... I could basically read their minds.

It's always the same. It's always the same. Dari dulu lagi... inilah keadaannya. Inilah yang akan terjadi.

And it hurts. Because, in that instant, they don't see me anymore. I don't exist.

I try to not let it get to me. I mean, this isn't the first time it has happened, kan? I should've gotten used to the fact that 'this' makes me essentially invisible. That I have - somehow - served my function, and am now rendered useless.

That they can't see me anymore.

Over the years, the pain should've dulled.

But it never has. And I don't think it ever will.

It hurts. So badly.

And then I get disappointed because I am not self-sufficient enough, self-contained enough, independent enough to not let this situation hurt me anymore.

To not care.

Heartless.

I am not so much as angry with those who have 'lost their way'. I am more... disappointed, if you will.

I thought they were different.

But evidently... people are all the same.

Berita Buruk Pagi Isnin

Oscar got hit.

Oh. My. God.

Oscar got hit.

I was in my room, busily working, when PnAzizati came in and told me to calm down.

Wha-?? Huh???

She told me that she was at Level1, and Oscar - who was sitting quietly in his parking space - got banged up.

OMG.

I've yet to go down and tengok the damage done. The person who banged into Oscar just called me, and I've got her contact details.

My poor baby.

I think I'm going to cry.


UPDATE
I think I'm going to be suffering from gastric pains today. Happens when I worry :(


UPDATE LAGI
Inspected the damage with TheBoyDownstairs.

Oscar needs a new coat of paint

:( :( :(

My poor baby.

The Passenger-Seat Driver

She turns to him and says, "You're driving us home, right? Right? Right? Driving us home in my car?"

And, amidst her bestfriend's (BFF) peals of laughter at his stunned expression, he replied, "Uh, okay."

Which was how he got to drive Oscar that Saturday.

"Mind if adjusted the seat?"

"Hey, whatever it takes to make sure you don't crash my car." and she hid a smile at his disgruntled expression. BFF couldn't stop grinning.

"So you turn right here. Yeah. Slowly. Watch out for that car. It's our right of way, so we go..."

"Okay." he shoots her a murderous glance.

Hmm. Interesting.

"So you want to take the right-most lane." Pause. "I find that signals makes this easier."

BFF giggled.

Oh, my. Are those thunderclouds in his expression? She just couldn't help herself. He really *is* too adorable.

And oh-so easy.

-smirks mentally-

She saw the traffic light change. But he seemed to have no inclination to slow down.

"Erm... red! Stop!"

Oscar stopped right at the traffic light.

"This is *just* like driving school." he commented exasperatedly. "I *know* it's red. I *saw*."

BFF was laughing madly in the backseat. He threw her a dark look. She squirmed.

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I can't help it! I love my car!"

"Yes, we can all see how well you've taken care of Oscar." he murmured, referring to the still visible white marks on the car, courtesy of her 'little mishap' with a wall earlier in the month.

"Oh, that was *mean*! Really! Fine, I'm not going to be a backseat driver whatever and I'll just shut up now." she sulked.

He sighed. Finally. Peace.

The girls continued chatting, and no further reference was made regarding his driving, other than giving directions to the BFF's house. It was noisy in the car, which was the norm, really, when the two girls met. They were gossiping a mile a minute, when...

"... oh, maybe you should signal since this is such a busy road..."

Hmpfh. Couldn't resist.

Biting Nails

I just finished reading Nana Volume 14, and feel like crying & shedding bucketfuls of tears.

God, who knew manga could move you so much???

And being the impatient me, I just *cannot* stand not knowing what's happening with Blast & Trapnest. C'mon, c'mon, c'mon! Gotta get me the next volume!

Excuse me if I seem a bit psycho. Reading Nana does that to me.

In The Night

And he said,

It's not like that. It's never like that.

And she asked,

So what's it like, then?

And he couldn't reply.

In the night I hear 'em talk
The coldest story ever told
Somewhere far along this road he lost his soul
To a woman so heartless
How could you be so heartless?